I just have one very important thing to say…

THE NEXT BOND FILM COMES OUT ON MONDAY!

Who doesn’t find that exciting? I’ve always loved Bond films, even since I was a child. In fact I recently re-watched all the Pierce Brosnan films from the 90s and was shocked (and a little horrified) at all the cheesy and mostly highly sexist innuendos. Which makes me even more excited that we’ve reached an age in Bond films where the sexual innuendos have fallen by the wayside, making room for strong, independent Bond girls and a James Bond with feeling and depth, instead of a 00 who’s about as deep as a puddle after it’s drizzled.

I never go to the cinema these days, simply because it’s really expensive and it’s too dark for me to do my knitting while I watch the film but for Spectre I’m going to push the boat out – get the special tickets in the special area with no children, free nachos, a bar area and HUGE comfy seats. So in the spirit of a) loving Bond and b) making sure my blog is up to date and relevant (because I’m a freelance digital media marketer, did I mention that?) I’ve put together a few bullet points to describe why I, woolly, Marple loving, knitting crazed woman that I am, love James Bond.

  • Well for starters, what woman (or man for that matter) in their right mind wouldn’t love James Bond? Gone is the Neanderthal of past films (and decades), he has been replaced by a deep and quite sensitive character. Someone who feels their kills and has a secret and damaging past, which gives him a keen sense of emotion and a real vulnerability. Simply put, you know that he’d beat someone up if they threatened your honour, but would let you hold him while he cried afterwards. Plus he looks great in a DJ. Completely unrealistic/highly attractive.
  • The story line. I love a fluffy white cat as much as the next crazy cat lady but with a more complicated bond has come refreshingly more complicated plot lines. Finally we’ve moved on from baddies from Russia wanting to take over the world and have got men that bleed from their eyes, female agents who have secret Norwegian lovers, completely mental and sinister blond hispanic men with seriously homo-erotic undercurrents (my apologies but I must exclude all references towards The Quantum of Solace – I have no idea why it was made, I’m not happy about it and I never want to see it ever again. End of.) and Aston Martins that re-start hearts and roll over seven times in a car chase – which is a world record by the way, the most rolls ever to have been managed in an Aston Martin car crash. Aston Martins are almost impossible to flip because they’re basically just race cars allowed on roads, which brings me nicely on to my next point…
  • …I LOVE Aston Martins. Again – knitting, cats, sherry… but also damn fast cars, I don’t see why I can’t combine them all at the same time (I do…cats can’t drive). The only down side to this is that usually, if not always the beautiful, awe-inspiring Aston ends up as a really expensive pile of rubble. Particularly painful in Skyfall when that happens to a beautiful vintage DB5 – it’s VINTAGE – it can’t be made again! Doesn’t Sam Mendez know that?!
  • Speaking of – Sam Mendez = genius. Can’t for the life of me figure out why Kate Winslet divorced him, although one presumes that genius’ are hard to live with. I’ve always been a fan of his work but never guessed that he could do spy so well. I think Spectre may be his final foray into the Bond franchise, but I hope not.
  • Okay, the clothes. I make a lot of clothes so I spend my life staring at items of clothing to figure out how they’re put together and ultimately if I could replicate them at my own humble sewing machine. These clothes that I study are often on other people, leading to an awkward amount of starring, it can make people uncomfortable, until I explain… and then sometimes afterwards. If you’re obsessed with clothes then there’s no better film than bond – I can stare and evaluate to my heart’s content.
  • As an add-on to my previous point, like everyone else I adore the glitz and glamour, the utter indulgent escapism that a Bond film offers. I think that is a timeless quality of Bond. The very first Bond book (Casino Royale) was released when the UK was still experiencing rationing. It offered a luxurious escape to austerity in the 1950s and it offers a luxurious escape to austerity now and that’s something I think everyone needs.

Aston Martin DB5, Why I love James Bond

I’d love to hear from you about your favourite Bond film or reason why you love the James Bond franchise, even if you don’t like it – I want to know why! In the meantime, I’m off for a martini and you know it’s not going to be stirred…

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